phatchemy za mnyou hodit khukouy to (ja govoryi smesnym golisom) kurasshiyy newidimiy neftemagnat i govorit chtoy eda eto lubov?)
you dissapoint me) letter from new yourk)
and my fans) dissapoint me) dissapoint me)
Now going out to search for smth
I can still
at the place out there
close my eyes
do you remember
when we felt
the only two
Looking through my childhood photos. They make me think about life. Somehow very deeply. What I live for, how I feel, why I feel it, how do I want to feel. So I need them sometimes.
About my situation. I have too many NEs. I know its not that hard. I can think and draw conclusions. I can make choice to leave it be or to push. I choose pushing 'cause I want the situation to change and without me...well, it might take too long. But I' m doing all I can. NEs don't help, they make actually worse. And I understand all the why's and all the what's, im prerry good at distinguishing, so..
So I just need to do without suffering. To do everything in my power. And also draw conclusions in the process.
Sad depressed and tired
Stomach aches like shit
Want to have friends who we live with in one room so we could live very cheap
And be musicians(thats what were gonna earch with)
And were gonna love freedom together
Saying someone can't be sad because someone else may have it worse is like saying someone can't be happy because someone else may have it better. L.R.K. - да, действительно.
I hate everything about you.
I feel as if I will never be happy.
Not telephone) Tetrris) Ok calling)
Overexplaining yourself is a trauma response that comes from a deep fear of abandonment or rejection.
ho is he not nowing about him)
i seen ms dos in the darkness)
learning russian language)
Hmhwww what`s new in the internet?)
I'm alone most of the time. Not in the common sense.
It was pleasant today, very much surprisingly.
But now it's just usual again.
Пусть же мне приснится идеальный мир...
Перед сном чуть потанцевала под агрессивную рейверскую музыку, представляя как ложу хуй на все и всех и все правила и просто танцую и все.
Сейчас спать пойду.
Imagine a mire and a steep slope who lead up to a plato. At the mire level everything is grey. On the plato everything is colorful and bright. Forests and sea, interesting forms and shapes. The mire level is almost my current condition. The plato level is the place beyond the pleasantness deficit threshold.
My aim is to reach the plato. Step by step.
Today. Practically i dont remember to recall my wishis during the day. Maybe 1-2 times week attempts.
Now i have a obvious wish to reach a professional sportsman intend of selfdevelopment. I must to increase this intent and wish.
Perfectionism is a risk factor for obsessive compulsive disorder, obsessive compulsive personality disorder, eating disorders, social anxiety, body dysmorphic disorder, workaholism, self harm and suicide, substance abuse, and clinical depression as well as physical problems like heart disease.
Slow and steady wins the race.
Strange I barely know you but yet I feel deeply connected to you
Crave I never had you but yet I feel so lonely without you
My beautiful stranger...
Мне почему-то очень грустно
A. is surprisingly smart and self-aware for his age. Though I don't understand his motive to study here.
Поймала себя ещё на том, что в совершенно обыденном разговоре с Ю. почему-то начала оправдываться, хотя вообще, блин, какого хрена.. 😅
What !F users say
Only today learnt about !F and created an account. Have to admit, this site is interesting and special, indeed. The idea is quite the thing! I'll be keeping my diary in spite of anything. I like this anonymity so much!
I really enjoy reading other participants, it's so much more sincere here than in any social network.
Such a funny idea, to keep an online diary, which can be read by anybody - and nobody at the same time.
I like a lot that there are no comments on !F. Here I have an impression that I am writing just for myself. I have less concern that my message will be evaluated.
I like Fragmenter very much. Now I have extra motivation to change. It's a big difference – just write to myself in a paper notebook, or write in order to share my thoughts.
Fragmenter is cool – I start to think once and again why I'm so depressed and how I came to be like that.
Fragmenter is the best thing that happened to me this year!