three days without smoking!
can't say it was super easy
but i'm glad i did it
i have a lot of support from my cinnamon bun :3
it really helps when i can say all of my thoughts and concers out loud
without any fear of being judged
and it's only the beginning!
yesterday was tough
i almost had a breakdown!
fortunately some wonderful people helped me with it
but for how long?
now i am awake
sometimes thinking about lots of the things i have to do makes me feel... vulnerable
sometimes i wish i could sleep for 16h/day
BUT WHAT'S IMPORTANT i don't feel this way now
wanna start reading 'power of now' and some papers for my thesis 💪
Искала треки среди музыки типа Рамштайна. Понравились несколько у Мерлин Менсона и System of a down.
Marilyn Manson - Para-noir https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSQvqnHKTp0
прикольный там коммент -Wedding song anyone?
I’d fuck you because Im your whore
I’d fuck you because you are a whore . Скинула это видео А
еще Менсон https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3sEKLlFLzI&has_verified=1
Ща пойду мыться, скоро на встречу с А. Не пойму, хочу ли накраситься. Нравится стараться не быть кп, не подавлять это желание. Но пока так и не поняла, хочу ли
upd А написал, что у него температура и что он не придет
chicken roll with spicy mustard
- came back to Dnipro
- tidied up
- made pea&chicken soup/ate 1/3/overeat
- post/Ali pants/tried on/love them
- bought cool socks and tooth brush
- couldn't throw away old pants&socks
- work 2h. ind. cafe + great coffee
- work 5h. online
- withdrew $ from paypal
- looked for aquariums online/didn't find/decided to go to some zooshops
- wrote students/scheduled work
- found a new student/scheduled him
- scheduled skating rink
- returned to fragmenter
- sneezed several times with gusto
- bottle of kefir
- aired the room
- admired myself in the mirror
- scheduled O and Y
- looked for rent apartm. in Kiev
long time no see, haha
decided to create a new profile
however my thoughts are still the same :)
decided to write in english
decided to deal with my smoking addiction
sometimes i believe that i'm a really weak person
sometimes i can't believe in my future success
sometimes i can't believe in myself
can i believe myself?
so i am trying to quit smoking
i had a pack from yesterday that i didn't throw away
and i have smoked in the morning
just because i had cigs
but then i threw it away anyway
another countless attempt huh
i don't know how i feel right now
i've felt pretty good for the whole day
will i be able to stop myself from smoking in the evening?
Oculus Quest is so awesome. Want.
I am tired and I am happy because of you. Your feelings do not hurt me any more.
At least I think so...
Hi there, it's me. I want to be with you from time to time.
well, i did all the stuff i've planned.
Ok, I published the story. My dear friend answered me, she said she has been very busy this year and she couldn't talk to me.
Tomorrow I'm going to the university.
I need snow, I miss snow.
By the way, I found a new amazing song of my favorite music band. It's amazing song, I really love it.
I'm a bit sleepy and tired at the moment. And I want to eat my dinner.
Well, the last fragment was so sad but now it's getting better. It seems like nothing happened with my mom so I'm happy.
I haven't researched the book yet, I hope I will do it tonight. I also have to make some stories. Just two and publish them as soon as possible. I promised someone.
So, as I said everything is fine!
I'm a bit tired now.
Everything is fine
Everything is fine
Everything is fine
I've got a problem but I hope it will be better as soon as possible.
Maybe I should tell about this. I've got a quarrel with my mom and now I don't even know what to do. She has beaten me today and she has tried to choke to death. I literally could die because I didn't have a breath. But fortunately I'm typing this text now so im still alive. The biggest problem is I didn't do anything wrong and I don't deserve this pain.
I hope I will be better.
Today I'm going to start my research. I have already chosen the book for it. I hope I will get a lot of good impressions while studying the book.
By the way, I don't remember if I already mentioned this but I visited the beauty salon yesterday. So I'm absolutely ready and beautiful today. I'm happy to look like this at the first day of the winter.
IT IS WINTER!
The last day of the autumn.
I'm not sleeping yet but trying to get as soon as possible.
So, I have masturbated today and... my clothes became dirty. So, I went to the bathroom to clean my clothes 😂
It's one of the times when I'm cleaning my clothes after masturbation. Fortunately it doesn't happen often.
I have a pleasant pain in my thighs.
I'm not British but there is nothing better than tea in the world.
But I also like coffee, wine and juice.
Today I have eaten a pasta, it's amazing. I adore Italian food.
It's a bit weird but I don't really know what to say right now. My toe is still in pain, there is an abrasion, but the pain is less than before.
Ok, im going to drink a tea and watch something interesting.
I HIT MY TOE ON THE CORNER OF THE BED
After this I went outdoors and it was so painful to walk. I came home and took the cream for my toe.
I'm in the bed now looking at my foot.
I think I will go to the kitchen to drink tea.
This fucking weather makes me sad, but tea is the only one thing can make me happy at the moment.
By the way I would like to drink some wine tomorrow.
It is still raining. All night? Ok, ok, it's autumn. But the day after tomorrow will be the first day of the winter. I need snow outside! I miss snow. How is it possible to see snow if the temperature is +4 Celsius?
Anyway, too much attention to the weather.
I'm trying to figure out what would I do today, I woke up some minutes ago and I'm still in bed.
Being in the bad is so cool. Last night I was literally getting wet. Something I'm so horny as much as babies in Twitter 😂
I don't even need a boyfriend or a girlfriend to have sex, but masturbation is not always possible for me just because I don't live alone.
Maybe I will masturbate today, hope I will find the time for it.
Oh... it's raining outside, I feel so lonely in the autumn rain. I'm always lonely when I have to go to the university in the rain, because I'm getting wet. But the only one moment when I can really enjoy rain is summer.
It seems to me like it's going to be finished. Maybe in the morning, road will be dry. I hope so.
But actually, the rain could be romantic, I even had a sex while it was raining outside. It's like catching a rhythm of the rain. The shower of rain could be perfect for getting orgasms 😂
I feel like I'm the only one person who doesn't care about Black Friday at all, maybe I just don't have any desire to buy something.
I feel empty a bit and my pain came back to my legs. By the way, I have finally visited the beauty salon, so this Saturday I'm going to make myself beautiful. I will be enough beautiful to meet this winter.
This day is have been thinking to watch a movie, maybe I will do it later.
I feel like the headache is coming. I hope it will be ok.
What !F users say
Only today learnt about !F and created an account. Have to admit, this site is interesting and special, indeed. The idea is quite the thing! I'll be keeping my diary in spite of anything. I like this anonymity so much!
I really enjoy reading other participants, it's so much more sincere here than in any social network.
Such a funny idea, to keep an online diary, which can be read by anybody - and nobody at the same time.
I like a lot that there are no comments on !F. Here I have an impression that I am writing just for myself. I have less concern that my message will be evaluated.
I like Fragmenter very much. Now I have extra motivation to change. It's a big difference – just write to myself in a paper notebook, or write in order to share my thoughts.
Fragmenter is cool – I start to think once and again why I'm so depressed and how I came to be like that.
Fragmenter is the best thing that happened to me this year!